Brian Michael的台词翻译(第五季)
翻译：san
season 5 (资料来源: MichaelandBrian.net)
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episode 501
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Michael: You know what amazes me?
你知道什么让我惊叹吗？
Brian: What, dear?
是什么，亲爱的？
Michael: Outside, a child is born, a man dies, a couple gets married…
外面，孩子出生，长者逝去，恋人结婚……
Brian: The ever-changing kaleidescope of life.
那些永远交替的生命轮转。
Michael: In here, Nothing changes. Everything stays the same. Same hot guys. Same ‘thumpa, thumpa’. Same shaved chests.
这里，所有一切都不会改变。同样的帅哥，同样的节奏，同样光洁的胸膛。
Brian: Mmmm, what a comfort it is to know.
嗯嗯，真叫人欣慰。
Michael: …but it’s all a lie. An illusion. Just cheap theatrics.
可是那全是谎言。一个幻影，不过是个粗糙的舞台效果。
Brian: Nevertheless…lets keep dancing!!!
不管怎样……继续跳舞！！
Michael: Look, you don’t fool me mister ‘I’m a rock. I’m an island” I know whow hard this has been for you’
瞧，你骗不了我，‘我是石头，我是孤岛’先生。我知道这对你有多难（hard）。
Brian: Hmm. You have no idea, Mikey, HOW hard!!!
嗯，你不会知道，Mikey，那有多难（hard）！！
Brian: Zowie, Zephyr. Check out that Super Cock?
呦，Zephyer，瞧瞧那超级大鸟？
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episode 502
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Brian: When did you change?
你什么时候改变了？
Michael: What?
什么？
Brian: When did you become this pias, sanctimonious, judgemental, twit?
你什么时候变成了这个痴障，假神圣，爱批判的家伙？
Michael: The point is not when did I change. The point is why haven’t YOU? You need to stop being this over-the-hill club boy and grow up!
最重要的不是我什么时候变了，而是为什么你没变？你必须停止继续当个上年岁俱乐部男孩，成长吧！
Brian: Oh, so now I’m the object of your disaproval too? You and the Nutty Professor get married. In fucking Canada. You move to Stepford avenue with all the other air sac heterosexuals and suddenly that gives you the right to make pronouncements on everybody else’s life? Well, welcome to the other side of your perfect marriage, Mikey. It’s called gay divorce. Fags and Dykes can fuck up their lives just like the rest of the world.
噢，所以现在我也成了你批判的对象？你和那个疯狂教授结了婚，在他妈的加拿大。你搬到直人社区跟那些直人住在一起，这给了你特权去主张他人的生活？Well，欢迎来到你完美婚姻的对岸，Mikey，那个叫做同志离婚。同志和拉拉也跟其他人一样会失败。
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episode 504
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Brian: Do you mind if I put this up?
你介意我挂上这吗？
Michael: Hard Heroes?
硬汉英雄？
Brian: Every superhero fantasy you’ve ever had, come to life!
所有你对超级英雄的终极幻想，变成现实！
Michael: Well, in that case, I’m not sure it’s appropriate for my younger clientel.
Well，如果是那样的话，我可不确定它适不适合我年少的客户。
Brian: Well, if your younger clientel is drooling over those bulging biceps and bountiful baskets the way you did, they are going to grow up to be fags anyway. So, what’s the difference?
Well，要是你的年轻客户也像你一样钟情那些膨胀的肌肉，他们就注定以后长大变成同志。所以，又有什么关系？
Michael: (hesitating) Yeah, Okay..
(踌躇)那，好吧……
Brian: I expect YOU to be there.
我希过你会过去。
Michael: Don’t think so. What with work, & fixing up the house, these days we get to bed pretty early.
想是不行。忙着干那一些活儿，还有收拾房子，这几天我们都睡得很早。
Brian: Superheroes, Mikey! Superman on Superman action.
超级英雄，Mikey！超人和他超凡的力量。
Michael: I’ll make you a deal. I’ll come check out your new place if you come check out ours.
我们来做个协意，我去你的新地方看，如果你也过来我们新家的话。
Brian: Just like when we showed each other our dicks. Deal.
就像当年我们给对方看老二一样。成交。
Justin: It’s pretty good!
挺不错的。
Brian: Pretty good is not good enough. When Michael sees it, I want him to lose his mind. And his breath. And his bladder control.
挺不错还不够。当Michael看见时，我要他无法控制自己，还有他的呼吸，还有他的膀胱。
Justin: And then what? Come running back to Babylon where he belongs? It ain’t gonna happen. Michael’s happy where he is.
然后呢？重投Babylon怀抱，他属于的地方？不可能了，Michael目前很快乐。
Brian: Gay men can not live on Tulip beds and speed bumps alone. Sooner or later the Serengeti will call and he’ll pace restlessly in his cage, howling at the moon. And he’ll break free from Surburbia and return to the Jungle where he belongs.
同志不可能在花床和路障(意指直人世界)活得太久。迟早野性就会苏醒，他将会在笼里发慌，对着月亮嚎叫。然后他将会冲出市郊奔回他属于的森林。
Brian: Well, Mikey. Congratulations.
Well，Mikey，恭喜你。
Michael: For WHAT?
恭喜什么？
Brian: You WON! To the spoiler… goes the victory.
你赢了！
Michael: I DON’T know what you’re talking about.
我不知道你在说什么。
Brian: Of COURSE you don’t. No one plays dewy-eyed innocent like you. Although at 35 you’re getting a bit long in the tooth for short pants.
你当然知道。没人比你更适合扮天真装无辜，即使你已经35岁老大不小了。
Michael: Speaking about outgrowing your act, nothing is more pathetic, to use one of your favorite words, than an over-the-hill club boy
说到不成熟，套用你最爱说的，没什么比当一个上年岁俱乐部男孩更可悲了。
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episode 509
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Debbie: I don’t like the way you’ve been treating Michael.
我不喜欢你最近对待Michael的方式。
Brian: Butt the fuck out.
滚出去。
Debbie: You’ve been on his case ever since he and Ben bought that house together.
自从他和Ben一起买了那幢房子你就咬着他不放。
Brian: He didn’t just buy a house, he bought the slicer, and the dicer, Ginsu knives, the abs roller, the juicer…top hundred hits of the ’60’s not available in any store. In short, every lie, every con, every color, shape and size of bullshit the straight world has to offer.
他何止买了一幢房，他还买了切片机、切菜机、金厨刀具、健腹机、榨汁器……在其他唱片行都找不到的60年代金曲。简单来说，就是来自直人世界的所有谎言，所有欺诈，所有不同颜色、形状和尺寸的鬼话。
Debbie: He fell in love. He got married. He had a family. Everything he’s ever wanted since he was a kid; a normal home. Why do you have such a problem with that? I’ll tell you why, you don’t. You’re problem is, he left you. He left you, and he moved on. Only he didn’t. You and he just made different choices, that’s all. It doesn’t mean that you don’t still love each other.
他坠入爱河，他结婚，他有了家庭，所有他自小就梦想拥有的，一个平凡的家。为什么你就是有意见？我告诉你为什么。你的问题是，他放弃了你。他放弃你，他继续下去。事实上他并没有。你和他只不过做了不同的选择，并不表示你们不再爱对方。
Brian: He won’t talk to me.
他不肯跟我说话。
Debbie: Then you talk to him.
那你就去跟他说。
Brian: Can I borrow you for a moment?
我可以借用你一会儿吗？
Michael: I’m in the middle of a conversation.
我正在跟别人谈话。
Brian: Theodore can regale you with his tales of the Yeshiva later.
Theodore可以留待下次再和你分享他的犹太高校故事。
Michael: What is it?
什么事？
Brian: I just wanted you to know that if it makes you happy being a stepford fag, then, I say, go for it. Be the biggest stepford fag in the world, it’s fine with me.
我想让你知道如果做个史待佛同志(stepford wife，意思完美娇妻)能让你快乐的话，那么，我说，去做吧。去当一个世上最完美的史待佛同志，我没问题。
Michael: What’s that supposed to be an apology?
这是什么，道歉吗？
Brian: I mean it.
我是真心的。
Michael: Aren’t you afraid I’m going to infect you? Look, just because we’ve been friends our whole lives doesn’t mean we have to stay friends. Especially since, we no longer have anything in common. So why don’t we just admit that the Brian/Mikey show is over, and get on with our lives.
你难道不怕我会感染你吗？瞧，就因为我们过去大半辈子曾经是朋友并不表示我们必须继续做朋友。尤其我们已经没有任何的共同点。所以，你为何不承认Brian Mikey秀已经落幕了，继续去过各自的生活。
Brian: Surprised to see you here.
没想到你会在这儿。
Michael: I wanted to ask you a question: Why did you apologize?
我想问你一个问题：为什么你要道歉？
Brian: I guess I miss you.
我想我是想念你。
Michael: You still love me?
你还爱我吗？
Brian: Always have (long pause) Always will.
一直爱 (停顿) 永远爱。
Michael: (in Ted’s voice) So do I.
(以Ted的声音) 我也是。
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episode 510
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Michael: I won’t waste much of your time.
我不想浪贵太多你的时间。
Brian: That’s good. ‘Cause I don’t have much to offer.
很好，因为我实在没有太多时间。
Michael: Then I’ll get right to the point.
那我就开门见山好了。
Brian: The point being – you want something.
也即是说–你有事相求。
Michael: Yeah.
对。
Brian: Wouldn’t happen to be to apologize would it?
那个不可能是道歉吧？
Michael: I believe it’s you that owes me that.
我想那个是你欠我的。
Brian: I already offered, you refused.
我已经给了，你拒绝接受。
Michael: ‘Cause you didn’t mean a god damn word!
因为你根本一点诚意也没有！
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episode 512
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Michael: I got your invitation, after I nearly died a second time from shock. I decided I’d come down to say…congratulations.
我收到了你的请柬，差点因惊吓过度第二度踏入鬼门关。我想我应该过来说……恭喜。
Brian: Well I figured if it makes Justin happy, what the hell.
Well，我想如果这样能让Justin快乐，管他呢。
Michael: Like you’ve ever done anything you don’t want to do.
说得好像你从没做过任何你不想做的一样。
Brian: Well as you so eloquently put it, I can’t go on being an over the hill club boy.
就如你说的，我不能永远当那个上年岁的俱乐部男孩。
Michael: Still, no one makes a case better for perpetual immaturity than you.
可是，没人比你更容易制造幼稚事端。
Michael: Look, what happened between us, I just wanted to say…
瞧，我们之间的事，我只想说……
Brian: Forget it. I behaved like an asshole. You behaved like a bigger one.
忘掉把。我表现得像个混蛋，你表现得更像个混蛋。
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episode 513
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Michael: I was planning on wearing this suit to the wedding, but with a different tie. What do you think?
我打算穿这套西装出席婚礼，不过系不同的领带。你觉得怎样？
Brian: What, are you trying to upstage me?
什么，你准备抢我风头？
Michael: I just want to look my best.
我只想以最佳姿式示人。
Brian: Doesn’t matter to me if you’re naked, as long as you’re there to give me away.
即使你没穿我也没关系，只要你肯出席就好。
Michael: Oh. Well in that case maybe I should wear my black leather pants.
噢。这样子或许我应该穿那条黑皮裤。
Brian: What you mean, the ones you wore -
你是说，那条你在–
Michael: First night we went to Babylon.
我们去Babylon的第一个晚上穿的。
Brian: They were so tight you could barely move.
它们紧得你几乎不能走动。
Michael: I know my balls were killing me! And that shirt you were wearing…
我知道，呛死我了！还有你穿的那件衣服……
Brian: What was wrong with the shirt I was wearing?
我穿的那件有什么不好？
Michael: No self-respecting pimp would be caught dead in that.
有自尊的家伙打死都不会穿上它。
Brian: I thought I looked pretty hot.
我以为我穿起来很好看。
Michael: You did look pretty hot. That night I…I jerked off thinking about you.
你的确穿得好看。那天晚上我……我想着你飞机。
Brian: Well what do you know – I jerked off thinking about me too.
Well，你知道吗–我也想着自己打飞机。
Michael: Who’d a thought that one day Babylon would be gone and we’d be sitting here in suits.
谁会想到有一天Babylon会消失，我们穿西装打领带坐在这里。
Brian: Talking about our wild and recklessly dressed youth.
谈着我们的年少轻狂？
Michael: Pathetic huh?
很可悲吧？
Brian: Inevitable.
不可避免。
Michael: Thought you might like some company.
我想你或许需要个伴儿。
Brian: What are you out so late?
这么夜了还跑出来？
Michael: It’s barely midnight, the good old days we’d be just heading off to Babylon.
都还没到半夜，想当年我们才刚准备要去Babylon呢。
Brian: Babylon’s gone, and so are the good old days.
Babylon没了，美好往昔也一样。
Michael: Not yet.
还没。
Michael: Christ.
老天。
Brian: What’d you expect? Dancing boys? Glitter falling from on high?
你指望什么？热舞男儿？闪光片从天而降？
Michael: This is where we came the night of our senior prom. When we dumped our dates.
我们高中舞会那天来到这里，抛下我们的舞伴。
Brian: The ghastly Judy Zumholtz.
惊人的Judy Zumholtz
Michael: And the equally dreadful Carol Golatny. We snuck in, got stoned…
还有同样可怕Carol Golatny。我们偷溜进来，喝得飘飘欲仙……
Brian: …Danced with our shirts off.
……脱掉衣服跳舞。
Michael: You got blown in the backroom. This is where it all began.
你到后房去吹箫。一切就是这么开始。
Brian: And ended.
和结束。
Michael: But it’s who we are. It’s what made us.
但这就是我们。这里造就了我们。
Brian: Didn’t you say that it’s all a cheap illusion. That outside life goes on, but in here nothing ever changes.
你不是说过这只不过是粗糙的舞台效果。外面的世界在继续，这里一切都没变。
Michael: I did that say that, yeah. But that was before I understood that some things aren’t meant to change.
我的确说过，对。但那是在我明白有一些事情不应该改变之前。
Michael: Dance with me.
和我跳舞。
(Brian轻蔑地笑)
Michael: Why not?
为何不？
Brian: Well for one thing there’s no music.
Well，其中一个原因，这里没有音乐。
Michael: Of course there is, can’t you hear it? The old thumpa thumpa.
当然有，你没听见吗？那段旧节奏。
Brian: Hey watch it asshole, you wanna bust your stitches?
嘿，小心点儿小混蛋，你想要爆线？
Michael: I’m fine. Come on. Come on! Shake that groove thing.
我没事。来吧。来吧！跟着节奏摇摆。
Brian: You shake it Mikey. I’m too -
你摇吧Mikey，我太–
Michael: What? Old? You’ll always be young, and you’ll always be beautiful. You’re Brian Kinney for fucks sake!
太什么？老了？你永远年轻，你永远美丽。天杀的你是Brian Kinney！
Brian: So what are they playing?
那他们在播什么歌？
Michael: Our song.
我们的歌。
Michael结束旁白：
So the thumpa thumpa continues, and always will. No matter what happens. No matter who’s president. As our lady of disco, the divine Ms. Gloria Gaynor has always sung to us: We will survive.
於是那节奏在继续，永远继续。不管发生什么事，不管谁当上了总统。就像我们的迪士歌女王，非凡的Gloria Gaynor小姐所唱的：我们会继续活下去。
